Today's Daily Joke

Miner:

A miner goes into town after several months of very hard work. When he gets to town, he decides to go to the local whorehouse unload some pent up frustrations.
He picks out a whore, takes her to her room, and she gives him a skillful blow-job.
When she's done, she reaches under the bed, pulls out a big mason jar and spits his wad into it.
"What the hell is THAT for?" he asks.
"Well", she says..."Me and my girlfriend have a running contest. Whoever has more at the end of the week...gets to drink both jars."

Today's Daily Joke

Microsex:

Three women were in a bar talking about their husbands and how they made love.
The first woman said, "My husband is a marriage counselor, and before we make love, he brings me flowers and candy. I like that."
The second woman proclaimed, "My husband is a mechanic, he makes love a little rough, but I like that."
The third woman replied, "Well my husband works for Microsoft and all he does is sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how good it's going to be when I get it."

Today's Daily Joke

Mickey and Minnie Mouse Divorce:

Mickey and Minnie Mouse were at court for a divorce proceeding. The judge told Mickey, "Look here Mickey Mouse, I can't grant you a divorce from Minnie!"
Mickey Mouse was stunned and asked, "Why not??!!"
The Judge said, "I've reviewed all the information you gave to the court, but I can't find any evidence at all to support the grounds that she is crazy!"
Mickey Mouse says, "Your Honor! I didn't say she was CRAZY, I said she was fucking Goofy!