June 2, 2009

The Daily Joke

Female Bashing:

Q. Why did God give men penises ?
A. So they'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.

Q. What's the difference between a paycheck and your dick?

A. You don't have to beg a woman to blow your paycheck.

Q. How is a woman like a laxative ?

A. They both irritate the shit out of you.

Q. What are the small bumps around a womans' nipples for ?

A. Its Braille for "suck here".

Q. Why do men die before their wives ?
A. They want to.

Q. Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women ? 
A. He died laughing before he could tell anybody.

Q. What's the difference between a woman with PMS and a pitbull?

A. Lipstick.

Q. Why do women have tits ?

A. So men will talk to them.

Q. What's the difference between a woman and a coffin ?

A. You come in one and go in the other.

Q. Why do women close their eyes during sex ?

A. They can't stand seeing a man have a good time.

Q. What's six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild ?
A. Money.

Q. Why did the army send so many women with pms to the Persian Gulf ?

A. They fought like animals and retained water for 4 days.

Q. What's the difference between your wife and your job ?

A. After 5 years your job will still suck.

Q. What's the best thing about a blow job ?
A. Ten minutes of silence.

and finally...

Q. Why are hurricanes normally named after women ?
A. When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house and car with them

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