June 27, 2009

The Daily Joke

DATING TIPS:

The Franklin Factor:
Early to bed and early to rise means it's time to meet more guys.

The Rat Race:
If there's one rat in a room full of nice men, he'll hit on you first.

The Eyeglass Prescription:
Don't wear your glasses on a blind date. You'll look better, and he will too.

The Ring Rule:
A watched telephone never rings.

The Creep Call:
Never pick up the phone on Saturday night. It's a call from a creep you told you were busy.

The Fishing Forecast:
They say there are lots of good fish in the sea. But who wants to go out with a fish?

The Psychological Prognosis:
Love is a form of temporary insanity curable only by marriage.

The Rope Trick:
Give a man enough rope and he'll lasso another woman.

Mind Over Matter:
No one ever falls in love with another person's mind at a cocktail party.

The Fault Finder:
The faster way to discover all your bad habits is to move in with your lover.

The Unintended Result:
1) Men's desire for sex sometimes results in intimacy.
2) Women's desire for intimacy often results in sex.

The Rabbit Rule:
Only newlyweds and liars make love every day.

The Dangle Doctrine:
You can't keep a good man down.

Twain's Truth:
Familiarity breeds children.

The Fertility Factor:
Women are only fertile a few days each month... unless they're single.

The Preparation Predicament:
The longer you spend in the bathroom preparing for sex, the more likely he's fallen asleep by the time you're ready.

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